Memory of You (A Misty Cove Love Story) Page 2

  Chapter Four

  After the last guests trickled out, Linda Gayle and I were left alone to do the final cleaning up a few minutes after midnight.

  “It's been crazy busy around here.” Linda Gayle leaned against one of the tables, dishcloth in one hand. “You’ve been back to town three weeks now. People giving you a hard time still?”

  I knew where this was going. She would continue on to ask about my life in New York and why I had returned. Talking about my problems was the last thing on my mind, but Linda Gayle had given me a chance when no one else would, and she’d always treated me with kindness, never meddling. The least I could do was answer any questions she had.

  “Not everyone,” I admitted. “But some have been kind enough.”

  “Give the ones who are not more time. People like to gossip because there's nothing interesting happening in their own lives.” Linda Gayle laughed, as if she had told a joke, her gray eyes sparkling. She was in her mid-fifties and still stunning. Her once black hair was now salt and pepper, but that seemed to be the only major sign that she was aging at all. Her skin was still quite smooth save for a few faint smile lines. Erin mentioned that Linda was religious about her weekly visits to the local beauty parlor where she was given the works.

  I smiled and wiped crumbs off a nearby table to keep myself busy.

  “I have to say it was mighty brave of you to return to Misty Cove after what you left behind. I applaud you for that.” Her voice was like hot chocolate, smooth and comforting. “Things didn't work out too well in New York? I heard you were married.”

  I stopped cleaning and a rock plunged into the pit of my stomach. Then I straightened up and looked at her. “My husband died a year ago.” My husband. Had Milton ever been that? Maybe on paper. “He... he had prostate cancer.”

  Shortly before his diagnosis, I had talked to a lawyer about filing for divorce. I had finally gathered up the courage to leave him. He told me about his diagnosis a week later. Leaving had seemed cruel after that.

  I would never have forgiven myself if I had left. So, I stayed another year and, in addition to several nurses, I cared for him, saw him as nothing but a patient. When he was abusive to me, telling me I was nothing without him, that I was not a real woman because I hadn’t been able to get pregnant, I reminded myself that nothing I said to him to defend myself would reach him, as he was already dealing with the biggest blow life could hand him. I knew, he envied me my health. But late at night in my queen-size bed, in my separate room, I counted the days and hours until something happened, whether he healed or died would be my ticket out. When he died, I’d found it hard to cry.

  “I'm so sorry to hear that. That's awful. I hope eventually you'll find the peace you're looking for here. Lilith would have been glad you returned home. She used to talk about you all the time, you know, said only good things about her granddaughter. She always defended you against poisonous accusations.”

  “Thank you.” I didn’t know what I was thanking her for, maybe because her tone told me that she was on my side. “Thank you, Linda Gayle, for giving me a job. No one else would.”

  “You needed a start.” She lowered herself into a chair, wincing. “This back is killing me.” She rubbed her lower back the way a pregnant woman would, and raised her gaze to meet mine. “Want to know a secret? I once made some similar choices to yours.”

  I raised an eyebrow and sat down as well. “You did?”

  She sighed and nodded. “The choice you made to leave Bryce. You were less of a coward than I was. I went all the way. I married a man I knew I wasn't in love with... not enough for marriage, anyway. Sex with him was great though. The best I’d ever had.” She gave a mischievous smirk. “But marriage is based on more than a roll in the hay. I was so young and stupid, as they say.”

  “What happened?” How was it possible that I didn’t know she had been married before? This was Misty Cove, after all, a boiling pot of gossip. Since childhood, I’d only known Linda Gayle as Marcus Steel’s wife.

  “After six months of marriage, I finally stopped being a coward and asked for a divorce. Hardest thing I'd ever had to do. Mama never did forgive me till her dying day. But it was the best decision for me. Thank God we didn't have kids. I never would have left.”

  “Wow, I never knew that.” I thanked God that I didn’t have kids with Milton either.

  “Not many people do. We had eloped to Vegas and then attempted to start a life in a tiny apartment in Georgia.” She folded the dish towel in her lap. “Many people here thought I'd run off with my boyfriend. When I returned to town, they thought we broke up. I carried on as if nothing had happened and brushed off any questions.” She placed the folded dish towel on the table and turned to smile at me. “I was a coward not to admit to Tony that I was not ready for marriage. You, on the other hand, you walked away before you dived into the cold water. I bet you a lot of money that many people in this town wish they had done the same thing. Maybe that's why they are so bitter toward you. You made the right decision not to marry a man you didn't love.”

  I didn't respond. She was partly right. I made a decision to walk away from Bryce, but unlike her, I had loved him and saw a future with him. Contrary to what people thought, Bryce had actually walked away from me first.

  Chapter Five

  The doorbell rang and I rushed to open the door, expecting Erin.

  My heart leapt to my throat when I saw Bryce standing in front of me, his blond hair drenched and plastered to his forehead. Raindrops dripped from the tips like liquid diamonds.

  Since the day he stood up for me at Gayle’s Diner, two weeks ago, I’d been wondering when I’d see him again.

  I never bumped into him at the grocery store, the bakery, or even during a walk on the beach. I still remembered how he had loved to go for an evening run on the beach every day, and how he would sit on the beach for hours before his jogs, painting the ocean.

  “Oh,” I said. “Hi, Bryce. I…I had no idea you were coming over.”

  “I want answers,” he said, not bothering to greet me. Behind him, the rain had softened to a drizzle.

  “Whaaa...” I gripped the door frame tighter, causing the blood to drain out of my knuckles.

  “Stop pretending you don't know what I'm talking about. You have never explained to me why you left me at the altar. I need to know now.”

  “You have no right to show up making demands.”

  “Oh, I think I do, Jade. After what you did to me, I think you owe me an explanation. I’m not leaving without it.” He pushed past me into the cottage. His gaze swept the room and when he looked back at me, something flashed in his eyes, sadness, anger, or regret. I wasn’t quite sure what.

  “Talk,” he said, positioning himself in front of the coat rack and jamming his hands into his pockets.

  My heart thumped inside my throat as I watched the twitch on the side of his jaw. “Do you want to sit down?”

  “All I want is the truth. I think you've left it out way too long.”

  I closed the door with a click and leaned against it. “I'm sorry.” Before we got to the truth, and no matter who was to blame, I did owe him an apology, even if it came five years too late. Despite what he had done to me, I had not handled the situation well.

  He shrugged and detached his gaze from mine, moving it to a place above my head.

  “Bryce,” I folded my arms in front of my chest, “you think I hurt you, and I did. I’m sorry. But you hurt me first.”

  His eyes flashed. “I hurt you? What the hell do you mean by that? I was freakin' waiting at the altar to marry the woman I love. When I saw you standing in the doorway of Trinity Chapel, I had never felt happier in my entire life.” He paused and pushed a hand through his hair, sending droplets flying. “You played me for a fool, walked as if you were coming to me.”

  He started laughing hard, so hard he collapsed into one of the English-style chairs that Gran kept at the door in case someone wanted to sit when putting on or
removing their shoes. He buried his head into his hands. “Imagine my surprise when halfway down the aisle, halfway to our life together, you turned away.” He looked up again and his face was a blur in my eyes. “You have no idea how much you hurt me by walking out of that chapel. You have no idea. My best friend, the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.”

  I sat in the other chair because my knees had weakened. “Have you ever... have you ever wondered why I did it, why I would walk away from the man I loved?”

  “What do you think I have been doing every single day for the past five years?” He rubbed the side of his face, the way he used to when he was confused. “What you did to me was cruel. Instead of talking to me, you walked away. Do you have any idea how humiliating it was to face all those people and not have an explanation why there would be no wedding?”

  I swallowed hard and felt the tears at the back of my eyes grow hot. “I had my reasons. I walked away for a reason.” I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. “But you're right, it was not right of me to walk away without talking to you.”

  “So, why did you? What was so bad about me that you could no longer imagine a future with me?” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “We’ve known each other since we were kids, we had experienced the best and worst moments together. We were best friends, dammit. I trusted you.”

  “I saw you, Bryce. The night before our wedding, you decided to have a little fun, didn't you? That, Bryce, that's the reason why I walked away. I was too hurt to think straight.”

  He shot to his feet, his eyes blazing. “Fun? What are you talking about?”

  “You… you had sex with another woman a few hours before you were going to vow to be faithful to me.” My lips curled into a sarcastic smile. “That night, I wanted to see you one more time before the wedding. I came to your place and saw you. I saw you fucking someone else. Now, please, go ahead and tell me who actually hurt whom.”

  The Adam's apple bobbed in his throat, but he didn’t say anything, his lips parting and then closing without a word coming out.

  My heart tightened. “Looks like you have no explanation for that.” I shrugged. “Well, you have your answer. I guess there's nothing else left to say.”

  He gazed at me for a long time. Then he stepped to the door, opened it, and walked out.

  As I remained sitting, the pain I had experienced the night before our wedding returned and it was hotter than I even remembered, fueled by the fact that he hadn’t even tried to deny it. As memories of pain hit me wave after wave, I allowed myself to cry for a future that had been snatched out of my hands, a future with the one man I had really loved.

  Milton had cheated on me, openly and often. Although it hurt, the pain could not be compared to Bryce’s betrayal. Milton had only broken half of my heart. Bryce had broken the whole.

  When I finished crying, I looked out the window and saw Bryce’s truck still outside, him gazing in front of him into the darkness. I couldn't see his expression but his posture told me everything. He was still in shock. He clearly never expected me to find out.

  I switched off the lights and went to bed.

  Chapter Six

  With a shopping basket hanging on my arm, I strolled down the aisle of Jim’s Groceries, trying to ignore the glares I got at each corner. The whispers followed me like a bad smell.

  “She has the nerve to return after ripping that boy's heart right out of his chest.” The woman didn't even bother to whisper. Rose Peterson from Rose Beauty Parlor. At nearly forty, she looked exactly the way she had when I had left town. She still wore her blond hair in a sleek ballerina bun, and was still attached to her smoky eye makeup.

  “That boy used to be a good boy,” she continued whispering to Mary Jane, the shopkeeper. “I heard that after she left, he found comfort in every willing woman’s bed, until he left as well.” She sighed and picked up a can of beans.

  “And for him to return when she came back to town as well,” another customer added as she walked by, and the other women nodded.

  I didn’t hear anything else they were saying. It all faded as my mind focused on what Lori had said about Bryce sleeping with countless women after I’d left. I couldn’t help feeling betrayed for a second time.

  After leaving Misty Cove, I’d spent a year and a half trying to get over him, pushing away any man that showed interest in me, grieving him. I couldn’t believe that he’d simply gone on to celebrate his singlehood. I’d broken his heart, they said. If only they knew what their golden boy had done to me, to my heart. He was so lucky I wasn’t one to go around laying out my dirty laundry.

  I stopped at the produce section, trying to calm down. And to think I'd come back home to heal.

  To get away from the women’s bad energy, I took what I needed and went to pay in silence, all the while feeling the stabbing glares on my back. I forced myself to move on, looking forward to going back home and hiding in the pages of a nice novel.

  As I hopped onto my bike a few minutes later, I decided I would not let those women and their gossip get to me. I was not going anywhere. Christmas was around the corner. It would be the most difficult day to get through, but I would survive, even on my own.

  Eventually I would sort out the mess between me and Bryce, and we would both be able to live in Misty Cove, leading our separate lives. But the thought of watching him date other women made my heart feel like lead, hot lead that burned my chest.

  Chapter Seven

  Linda Gayle gave me Christmas Eve off. I’d been working myself to the bone for weeks and she wouldn’t take no for an answer. What she didn’t realize was that working helped me cope. It distracted me.

  Now, as I sat on the couch with the TV on mute, eating my carrot cake, I had never felt lonelier. For the first time in my life, I was spending Christmas alone. Erin would have spent it with me, but she was celebrating with her on-and-off boyfriend, Trevor—one of the Laclaire brothers. I remembered the seven brothers well, who thought because they owned half the businesses in Misty Cove and nearby towns, they also owned every beautiful woman. They changed women like they would underwear.

  I hoped Erin didn’t get hurt for dating Trevor, who was apparently only back in town for Christmas before returning to Nashville to chase the limelight. He was a singer in a band.

  But who was I to judge? It wasn’t as though I had made the best choices when it came to dating. I only hoped Erin got whatever she wanted out of her romance with Trevor Laclaire. They had been dating on and off since high school. Whenever he was in town, they were a pair.

  I thought back to high school, when Bryce and I had been the only couple that stuck together as others searched for love in different places. We were unshakeable. We had been so in love that all our plans included the other. Not wanting to be apart, after graduating from high school, we both applied to the same colleges. We were lucky that the University of Florida accepted both of us. We packed our bags and shared a dorm room for four years, living like a married couple would.

  My lips curled into a bittersweet smile as both warmth and pain filled my chest.

  I hadn’t talked to Bryce since the day I had told him the truth about why I had walked away from our future together. He never showed up at my door again, and when we bumped into each other in town, we were like strangers. We went about our business, pretending we didn’t feel the pain of seeing each other. But that was all we felt. At least that’s how it was for me. I saw him three days ago, buying Christmas decorations at the holiday market. I pretended not to see him while I bought candy apples from a stall.

  I chewed on my lower lip, watching the Christmas lights of a neighboring cottage blink, muted by the sheer curtains draped over the living room window facing the street—red, green, and yellow twinkles. Christmas had always held a special place in my heart. As a child I made myself believe that it was a magical time and the wishes made on that day would come true. One of them almost did. Every Christmas when I was young, I had wished that one day
I would be Mrs. Bryce Colman.

  The Christmas we graduated from college and we were back in Misty Cove, Bryce had told me to cancel any plans. The only plans I’d had were the same ones I had every Christmas since childhood. Enjoying a nice Christmas dinner with Gran and some of the homeless people she had always welcomed into her home for the holiday, and then continuing the celebration with Bryce and his family. This time he wanted us to spend it alone. How could I resist?

  He’d taken me to a cottage he had rented for the night. A cottage he had spent days decorating with all things we loved to have for Christmas. That night he had proposed to me and we spent the rest of it making love until morning, when the news spread like wildfire. People were not surprised.

  That night was one I swore I would never forget. Well, I never did forget it, but when I remembered it now, the memories were broken and wrapped in a blanket of pain.

  I placed my plate next to me on the couch. There was no way I could eat anything now. I missed Gran so much. She would have made it all better, the way she did when she visited me in New York and saw the pain on my face, signs of a broken marriage. She had tried to talk me into divorcing Milton even after his diagnosis, but she understood my hesitation.

  I tucked my feet under me and closed my eyes, listened to the sounds of laughter and music filtering in from outside. I remembered the aromas of cinnamon and home-cooked meals. I heard Gran’s soft, loving voice whispering, “Merry Christmas, Angel” into my ear on Christmas morning. It was hard to believe that those days were gone forever. Now I was alone and had lost everything but this cottage and the memories.

  A tear slipped down my cheek as I stood and pulled back the curtains. The Christmas lights were now blurry through my tears. The street was clear, apart from a wild dog that was trying to tip over a garbage can. I listened to the sounds coming from the other cottages, carried on the night breeze to come and taunt me.